Sunday, April 23, 2006

Warning: Old Article Posting Ahead

Sometimes I will post a piece that I wrote years ago. Here is the first one for a defunct online magazine called "Commotion" from around 1998, I believe. "Commotion" was an attempt made by me and two of my friends that quickly went belly-up. I wrote a few pieces for it but since this blog is related to sports, I can only post one article, and you can read it shortly....


I'd Like To Thank God For Giving Me The Strength To Write This


Your team has just won the playoff game! The three star players for the team have had stellar performances, so they are being interviewed by the Jim Grey. He asks them each about their play on the court, and each of them goes on their cliche way on perserverence and momentum and then they come to this: " I want to thank God for this victory today. "

The heavyweight champ blugeons his opponent, a KO in the second round of the championship boxing match. Larry Merchant stands beside the reining title-holder and, after "thesaurusing" us, he asks the fighter about the bout. The fighter, as we see the defeated challenger being carried out of the ring on a stretcher, chimes faithfully, "I thank God for the strength to fight tonight."

Did I miss something here? When did God suddenly care about the big game? Is God taking sides in sporting events now, placing a little money down on it? How fair would that be? How does he decide who will win and who will lose? "Hhm, let me see.... the Knicks have seven players who believe in me, but the Miami Heat only have four....","Oh, my, this is a tough one: both men have prayed before the match, both are sincerely devoted to my teachings.... guess I'll have to flip a coin on this one." I think there are more important things to dwell on than who should win the championship game. Aren't there other issues more pressing: "Hey God, the third world here. We sort of have a famine crisis here so could you pull yourself away from the Direct TV for a little while and help us out ? We're dyin' here!!"

Actually, I don't believe God is doing anything like that, and neither do you. Wouldn't it be nice, though, not to have to hear that over and over again at the end of every sporting event ? What these players are doing, of course, is avowing their faith in God, which is alright but please don't do it in my living room-- geez, there are kids watching! Isn't there something about the seperation of church and sports? Give the credit where the credit is due, people: to the atheletes themselves. To their talent and skill, their tireless efforts for perfection, their singlemindedness and sense of purpose.... and sometimes, to a canyon-full of luck!

Besides, if God had anything to do with it, wouldn't you think the San Diego Padres and the New Orlean Saints would have won world championships by now?

Email Sent To Steve Kerr @ Yahoo Sports

I have been reading and hearing much about the injustice that has been cast upon the Dallas Mavericks: 60 wins during the regular season and they end up with the fourth seed in the Western Conference playoffs. I disagree that this is an injustice.

The way the divisions are set up in the NBA at this time, it is proper and just the Mavs are only the fourth seed-- they didn't win their division, they didn't win any of the other divisions, either, so they are the fourth seed. This is not the first time this has happened in sports, and it won't be the last as long as the league's conferences are structured the way they are. The only way to achieve justice: Eliminate divisions. That's the only way to solve the problem in a fair and just manner. If next season a change is made and a division winner is seeded any lower than number three then that will be an injustice, too, because that team won a division, so why should they be penalized for winning less than annother team that won more games but came in second in their division?

The only way to balance the scales of justice: Eliminate divisions.